Perception is Reality

Perception is reality.  In other words, the way we see things creates our reality.  If we believe everyone is against us, we will find proof of that.  If we expect good things to happen, we find those things.  Our reality and perceptions are our paradigm.
Activity to Do:
To help student leaders to understand this concept, use two different pairs of glasses frames.  Call one pair of lenses the negative paradigm glasses, and the other pair the positive paradigm glasses.  Model for the students how thoughts can be different about the same situation.  Example: recess.
*Put on the negative glasses.  Say things like:
No one ever wants to play with me at recess.
Kids don't even play kickball, they just fight over whose turn it is.
I hate how loud it is.
*Put on the positive glasses.  Say things like:
There are always different activities I can choose from at recess.
I love to play kickball.  When we disagree it gives us a chance to practice working things out.
I like listening to all of the laughing, talking and shouting.
*Have students create a list of situations.  Let them take turns trying on the different pairs of paradigm glasses and making comments.
Once students understand the concept, it gives a new tool for talking to them.  You can say things like, Right now you are seeing the situation through one pair of glasses.  Try putting on a different pair of glasses and think about this situation some more.

In the Spirit of Word Cup Soccer - An inspiring story of kids and soccer...

Click here to see the story:  Soccer Team Dream
In the spirit of the World Cup, here is an inspiring soccer story about a group of kids from Koh Panyee, which is a floating village in the south of Thailand.   They began with the end in mind - a vision of having their own soccer team...watch this video and you can't help but admire the gumption of these kids.

For Reflection:
*What excuses could this group of children have given for not being able to play soccer?  What obstacles could have tempted them to give up once they started? 
*How did it help this group to begin with the end in mind, and what small steps did they take along the way in order to reach the goal?

Sharpen the saw and feel a little Hawaiian

I just had the easiest, most refreshing smoothie that transported me to a Hawaiian frame of mind.
1.  Freeze a fresh pineapple.

2.  Toss the chunks of frozen pineapple in a blender with a can of coconut milk (the lite kind tasted fine).
3.  Yum.
This would be an easy demonstration for your student leaders and give them an idea of a healthy way to care for their bodies.  Our school nurse and assistant librarian started a health leaders club at school this year.  In turn, those students educated the rest of the student body about ways to sharpen the saw.  What a win-win!

Seek First to Understand - Summer Sibling Squabbles

Seek first to understand, then be understood.  Habit 5 is so much easier said than done.  The hardest place to practice this habit is probably the best place to practice it...you know what I am going to say...home.  Today a friend made me laugh when I read her Facebook post.  She said the way to get her children to stop fighting is by coming in and yelling, because then the kids unite against the evil mother.  I have been in that role so many times!  So the other day I decided to get messy and work with my teens at home with their listening skills when they were at each other.  The initial reaction was that they united against me and told me to stop treating them like they were in third grade.  I said, "Actually, although a third grader can learn to listen, this is a very adult skill."  They glared.
Let's see if I can sum up the exchange in a shortened version.
Me:  Child One, say what you want to say.  Child Two, listen, because you are going to repeat it back.
Child One:  Well he said...
Me:  Talk directly to Child Two, I am just here to moderate your conversation.  Try starting with "I feel..."
Child One talks.  Child Two talks back instead of repeating what he heard Child One say.
We start over.
Child One talks directly to Child Two, and I have Child Two answer, starting with the phrase, "So you are saying that..."
Repeat of steps with Child Two talking to Child One.
Repeat of all steps multiple times, with Child One and Child Two still getting in their jabs and cut-downs at first.
Things finally are less escalated.  They start to listen and repeat.
I see my window of opportunity.
"Now that you have both heard each other, how can we think win-win?"
***
It wasn't perfect, but it worked.
We aren't riding off into the Covey model family sunset.  Not even close.
I still know how to yell and tell them to be quiet.  But we are working at it.  Sometimes.
And that is how the habit of listening is developed.

Video Clip: What can you do with one leg?

Boy with one leg plays soccer
     In keeping with this week's theme of World Cup Soccer, here is another inspirational soccer story.  Before using this clip with student leaders, have them fold a piece of scrap paper in half.  At the top of the sheet they should write the word "Yes" on one side of the fold, and "No" on the other side.  Tell students you are going to read a list of activities to them.  If they think it is an activity that a child with one leg could do, they should put a mark in the "Yes" column.  If they think it is an activity a child with one leg could not do, they should mark the "No" column.  Here is the list:  read, color, basketball, sing, swim, sled, ice skate, blow out birthday candles, decorate a Christmas tree, roller skate, gymnastics, score a soccer goal.  Out of the 12 possible activities, how many "Yes" marks do they have?  Have them compare their answer with a neighbor and discuss their reasoning.
     After watching the video, they will realize that they should have all 12 activities marked in the "Yes" column.  Proactive people show their strength by being in charge of their thoughts and actions.  How would a person with one leg need to show strength with thoughts?  Actions?  Would Nico have accomplished as much if he had felt sorry for himself and told himself that life is not fair?  Why would a company want to use Nico to advertise a product like Powerade? For more information, go to this link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/207785779240060/

Synergizing - A Quote for Reflection

Everyone is in love with his own ideas.

-Carl Gustav
 Discussion questions for student leaders:
*What does this quote mean, and is it a good thing?  Why or why not?
*How can having someone disagree with you help you to learn?
*Is it okay to love your ideas?
*How can "seek first to understand, then be understood," be a helpful habit when synergizing and listening to the ideas of others?